Should I give Jesus my chocolate?
I put it out there the other day and I can’t help but talk about it.
Thinking about Jesus wanting “everything” eventually gets me thinking of chocolate…
For those of you who know me, you know that I’m not being disrespectful, I’m serious. A few of you have told me I need delivered, and other friends… well, I think we are even better friends because we share our chocolate with each other in rough times (you will need to read on).
Wondering why in world I would even consider such a crazy thing?!
I’ve been part of Mary DeMuth’s launch team. I’ve been doing the happy dance for weeks now, and NO it’s not on video, and my family is thankful that I’ve decided to NOT embarrass them in this way. I’ve been reading through Everything. It’s about growing like crazy in real ways, that aren’t programmed, and are often NOT easy. YET, we get so. much. more. back. from. Him.
Why it took forever for me to give Jesus anything
When I walked from Jesus as a teenager, I walked far and fast.
At some point, I started thinking about walking back towards him
I listened to Christian radio stations, while at a bar had curious talks that I can’t remember now about Jesus, and sporadically visited church, trying to blend in the back row wearing-a-you-can’t-hide-in-that-crazy-short-dress, sister.
“When we operate by considering Jesus as the well, drawing all to Himself, we can rest instead in His genuine irresistibly and His ability to draw others to Himself.” – MaryDeMuth, Everything
He drew me.
I debated… afraid of failing, not doing it right again…
But he didn’t give up.
Source: marydemutheverything.tumblr.com Created by Alycia Johnson Morales.
And I wish that I wouldn’t have wasted so much time thinking it over…
My life would have changed so much sooner.
He asked for my past
When I finally decided that I was going to follow Him, I THOUGHT I had decided to give Jesus everything.
Because He could handle it, I piled it on… unhealthy relationships, abuse, loss, abortion, bad decisions.
He took every bit of it.
Source: marydemutheverything.tumblr.com created by Created by Kris Camealy
He carried it off
And handed me back peace, security, joy
things I could never find before no matter how hard I tried.
“I must depend on His ability to bring sprouts limbs, flowers and fruit.” – Mary DeMuth, Everything
And he asks us to give more, grow more
If I could have stayed in the place where I just gave Jesus my past, we wouldn’t be talking about chocolate – we still are, really. The past few years, I’ve struggled giving Jesus many things – my career, marriage, mommy expectations and my body.
When my body rebelled on itself and I got psoriases in waaay too many places to be cute, I gave Jesus my desire to look how I want to look. Many times I sat crying next to a pile of clothes that didn’t cover anything right.
Lots of tears, anger, giving, taking back, and finally I handed it over as much as I could.
And he gave me back inner confidence – not cover girl confidence, but Jesus kind of confidence that doesn’t wash off easy. What’s grown in and through my hard places is only evidence of Jesus being there.
Sometimes I’ve said, “Okay Jesus… how much more do you want?”
And I think he might say, ”Depends… how much do you want back from me?
And I want ALL that Jesus has for me.
We made it back to chocolate, and you thought we’d never make it back!
This is where I probably should say, I will give up chocolate – but I don’t know that I’m ready… yet.
But I do think about the debating and time I wasted before, and I think about all he gives and I wonder if I should hand it over now.
I DO know He’s waiting for when I’m ready,
and He will have something so much BETTER than chocolate for me.
Since I’m still having chocolate …
No related posts.